I know, it has been too long since I last wrote here. I feel like this is how I always start my blog posts – by apologizing for taking 475389 weeks off writing to three of my loyal readers (me, included).
But today is not the time to apologize – we’ll save that for a year from now, when I write my next blog post. Today, I celebrate the fact that I’m officially graduating in less than a week. Five days, to be precise.
Not only that – I’m also graduating with first class honors AND as the valedictorian! I’m shamelessly smiling to myself with pride now. For two years, my dad has been asking me about graduating with honors and I can’t believe I can finally give him that good news.
I worked my butt off for this and although I kinda expected the results I got, I NEVER saw myself as valedictorian. That was the biggest surprise. Sure, I imagined myself giving a speech at graduation a few times as I was growing up – but that was more of a fantasy I came to accept would never happen because I am a Mass Communications student. Everyone openly thinks mass comm is an easy course (it’s not) and that anyone can pull it off. With that in mind, I always assumed the valedictorian candidates would only come from the ‘high-end’ courses like medicine, accounting and law.
But I’m not going to dwell on that too much. However, I’m going to say something (tastefully) to all the naysayers (my parents’ friends included, and one of my childhood peers) that tried to put me in a place where I felt like I was lesser than them.
Fuck that. I worked my ass off and I know for a fact that some of them could never do what I did. I’m proud of my work. Took me five whole years to say these words. I always felt like I was not good enough or that my work was subpar. But none of those were true. I only wish I stopped feeling this way a long time ago so that I could enjoy all the kind words and compliments my lecturers and family had given me about my work and short films. I would probably feel a lot better and confident today. In fact, I would probably have pursued some of my ideas – ideas that I never had the guts to go with because I thought they were bad.
I have so much more to say but I’m going to save it for another day. I just wanted to check in here and get the ball rolling again.
I’m wearing a baju kurung and I already received my robe and mortarboard. I have so much to look forward to and a speech to work on.
Till the next one!